I Belong To Nobody
by Catilleon
Summary: Events in life change like the wind. Sometimes this leads to new events. Usually... it kills us. In Cloud's case both. Now a Nobody his life has changed for the weirder. Believe it or not... he kind of likes it. Clouffie. CloudxTerra. CloudxLightning.


I Belong to Nobody

Chapter 1- I Belong to Organisation XIII

* * *

**A new story? This seems ill advised.**

So does everything I do, at least with this I won't end up bleeding from my tongue.

**True you are an idiot.**

Don't make me hurt you.

**Impossible I'm not even simply incorporeal I'm just plain non-existent.**

Damn the horrors of creative writing.

**Why did you even lick the inside of a freezer?**

I was curious and there were no frozen poles nearby.

…

What?

**You really are a cat.**

Shut up. Now if you excuse I'm going to have a nap.

**In the sun?**

Well I'm also a gamer so… no.

**Please don't further stereotypes.**

They're not going away anytime soon so I might as well us them to confuse and annoy people. Now then disclaimer.

**If it will get on with this shit, fine. Catilleon doesn't own Kingdom Hearts or any other character or element he might through in eventually out of boredom or for the sake of a bad joke. **

I do what I must because I can.

* * *

The beast was monstrous. A sheer giant of swirling shadows. Its movements seemed jaunty yet fluid. Chaotic yet practiced. To put it un-poetically it was a fucking large heartless.

More specifically a pure blooded heartless called Darkside. Even more specifically it was three of them.

The lone figure the three heartless surrounded didn't know the technical term for the heartless, he just knew that he really should have turned left at that last crossroad instead of right.

That wasn't a metaphor either. Stupid sign.

Ain't that the way it always seems to go.

Minus the monsters of course… well unless you live that sort of life.

Back to the standoff.

CRUSH!

The Darkside standing in front struck the first blow, slamming its clawed hand into the where the figure was standing. The figure though was faster.

With trained speed the red scarfed figure spun his massive bandaged blade slicing the limb directly along the middle. Sending the two halves smashing to either side of the figure. Causing a cloud of dry dust and cracked dirt upwards.

The Darkside though didn't flinch and brought down its other arm down in the same place. The Darkside's to the left and right followed suit and sent each of their clawed palms into the ground.

In the massive dust cloud that was formed the swordsman unleashed a flurry of lightning fast slices. Carving the deadly limbs into pieces.

As the dust cloud subsided not a single Darkside was left with anything beyond their joints.

However their work was already done.

Piecing the swordsman's gut was a single sharp Darkside claw.

Falling to his knees Cloud watched on as his heart was severed from his body and floated upwards.

As his life giving heart soared higher and higher Cloud's body was consumed by bubbling shadows.

The three Darksides watched until the dead was done, once all that remained was a plume of dark mist the three pure blooded heartless returned to the shadows to lick their wounds and locate other hearts drenched in darkness to seek out and take.

Behind them, unnoticed until now, a man dressed in a black leather robe and robe and bearing an eye-patch over his left eye. With only a single eye he had watched as the events unfolded.

"This guy had a lot of darkness in his heart… but," Xigbar watched as the plume of mist parted to reveal a still intact body. "His will to live is admirable." Teleporting with a Corridor of Darkness (1) Xigbar arrived by the newly formed nobody. "Xemnas did say that we needed new recruits after those losses at Castle Obilivion. Well then, better wake you up." Xigbar clapped.

"Hey blondie!" No response. "Spikes!" The new blonde nobody snored. Xigbar gritted his teeth. "Fine then!" Manifesting one of his Sharpshooters in his right hand The Shooter levelled the sights of the Arrowguns at the sleeping chocobo head's… well head and pulled the trig-

CLANGH!

Xigbar backpedalled as his bowgun was knocked out of his hand and sent flying into a nearby cliff by a giant metal sword. Holding the blade was the previously asleep and newly created blonde nobody.

'It's a different blade from before, more… complex?' That was the only way Xigbar cloud describe the mass of swords connected together to form one massive blade.

"Who… who are you?" The new nobody asked, judging from the way he looked around he didn't know where he was, who he was or where the hell the giant multi-sword had come from.

Xigbar smiled, this was just way too easy. "I'm your new friend."

"Friend?"

"Yeah, name's Xigbar the Freeshooter and Number II of Organisation XIII and as for your name… well let's see." Stretching out a gloved hand Xigbar touched the new nobody's chest, where his heart once was.

As if on command a mess of shining white letters formed in the air directly in front of the new nobody's face.

'C-L-O-U-D.' The new nobody spelt to himself, before he could fully say the name an X suddenly appeared and slotted itself in between the letters. Spinning around in the air the white letter moved around the X forming a new word.

'L-U-X-O-C-D.' The newly named nobody spelt out in his head.

"Luxocd huh?" Xigbar said with a gloved hand on his chin. "Not bad. I've certainly heard worse, did you know we've just found a guy called Roxas. Then again at least that one's easier to pronounce. Mind if I call you kouhai?" Cloud said nothing, he had no idea what kouhai meant, however Xigbar took it as a yes. "Well then I suppose that I should be taking you back to The World That Never Was."

Turning around Xigbar walked a bit and formed a Corridor, he was about to step through it when he noticed that his new kouhai wasn't following.

"Uh kouhai, you have to follow me if you want to get to the World."

"Why?"

Xigbar blinked. "Sorry."

"Why should I follow you to this World That Never Was?"

"THE World That Never Was. The 'the' is important. As to why, so you can formally be inducted into Organisation XIII."

"What reason do I have to listen to a man dressed in a black hood who tried to shoot me in the head and follow him to a world that, by its own name, isn't supposed to exist?"

Xigbar chuckled nervously. 'Guess he's not as dumb as I thought.' Thinking through all the possible reasons for joining Organisation XIII. The powerful weapons, the ability to control your own strain of lesser nobodies, your own room in a giant castle, a free minibar. In the end Xigbar decided on his favourite. "You get to wear a snazzy leather robe."

Believe it or not he was serious. Badies are often less intimidating once you've learnt how much of an idiot they are.

Luxocd sweatdropped, but somewhere in the back of his mind, for reasons he wasn't entirely sure of, the nobody had a flash of a little raven haired girl saying he'd look good in leather.

There were quite a few things he wasn't sure about when it came to the brief flash. He wasn't sure who it was meant to be. He wasn't sure what she meant, or even why she was blushing when she said it, but it did sway him a little.

In the end apparently a little was all he needed.

"Might as well, I doubt I have anything better to do." Luxocd admitted with a shrug. Xigbar laughed and clamped Luxocd around the shoulders.

"Yeah that's the spirit that got all of us in. That really **really** poor spirit. Come on then."Xigbar dragged the blonde spike head to the Corridor portal. "One more thing since I'm the one that recruited you, you'll have to call me sempai. It's just something that we do."

'Lies!' A chibi-Xemnas screamed off screen.

Xigbar though just shut off his conscious and grinned broadly. 'This could prove fun.'

"Hey sempai." Luxocd asked.

"What is it?" Xigbar asked herding them into the Corridor.

"What happened to my sword and your gun-arrow things?"

"Eh, I'll tell you later."

With that the new kouhai and sempai passed through the Corridor of Darkness to The World That Never Was.

* * *

**Approximately one year and three diaries have passed since I joined Organisation XIII. Finally though, Superior has approved me for field work.**

Luxocd looked up from the leather bound book he was writing in.

Standing atop a metal pipe Luxocd was offered a majestic view of the Hollow Bastion shopping district. Below him a multitude of low class heartless who walked the streets were blown into tiny dark pieces by explosions that seemed to appear out of nowhere.

Luxocd frowned.

**Superior sees fit to give me ****Demyx**** idiot level missions. I'm supposed to be watching the progression of heartless in hollow bastion. A single group of non-Dusk nobodies could that, actually…**

With a wave of his hand Luxocd summoned a dozen Samurai nobodies into existence. Mentally he directed the nobodies to keep watch over the area and report back to him.

Silently the Samurai's nodded ever so slightly and quickly moved out, spreading themselves over the various areas.

**Mission complete. If there's one good thing about Roxas leaving it's that I get his nobodies. Though I do wonder sometimes if Axel's whining is worth it.**

'I suppose I might as well look around while I'm here.' Luxocd though tapping his sliver fountain pen against the silver nobody symbol on the cover of his diary. 'Guess I should get dow-'

A heartless was blown apart by a claymore explosion.

'… Maybe I'll stick to the rooves. No-one's crazy enough to come up her-'

CRUNCH!

"What was that?" Yuffie said as she landed on a nearby roof. "Wait a minute… an enemy!"

Yuffie smirked. "Hah, show yourself evildoer. You think you hide from the skills of the Great Ninja Yuffie. Nyuk nyuk nyuk."

Luxocd groaned as the Great Ninja Yuffie, as she so declared, dug her left shoe into his right temple.

"Please… get off… me."

"Ah sorry." Yuffie yelped as she jumped off the black hooded man. However her eyebrows soon knitted together. "Wait… a man dressed in hooded dark clothes, skulking around on the roofs. Hah, an enemy thinking that they can trick the Great Ninja Yuffie. Well then, en gauruhhhhhhh." Yuffie's insane rambling, or as she would call it 'speech of awesome bravery', was cut out as the hooded shadowy man stood up.

All 5'7" feet of him dressed in a very dangerous looking black leather robe towering over the sixteen and rather sma-peti-fun sized ninja.

"I don't remember gimps being so terrifying."Then again great ninja or not Yuffie, was still Yuffie.

"…"

"Did I just say that out loud?"

Luxocd nodded, the wooziness in his head prevented him from doing much else. Though he did make sure to be angry.

"So, uh where was I…" Yuffie said stratching the back of her head, "… Ah! We were preparing for an epic duel. En guar-"

THUMP!

"Uh? I guess you need to lie down." Yuffie chuckled at the collapsed robed man. "… Hello? Hey wake up! Oh dear, I should probably do something about this."

Yuffie looked at the six foot tall heavy built man. Then she looked at her own, and she would never admit this out of the confines of her own mind, very… small body.

"Ah damnit!"

* * *

Luxocd's mind flooded with pain as he forced himself back into consciousness.

'Wait… do nobodies technically have minds. I'll have to ask sempai about that… or maybe one of the Vexen Replicas.' Luxocd shivered. 'No, forget that Vexen was a scary bastard when he was alive and his freaky clones make sure he's still a scary bastard in death.' Coming from the guy whose weapon is a cross between a puzzle, an engineering project and a zanbatou.

Shaking his head Luxocd took in a view of his surroundings. His first though? It was very… pink, and floral. Comfortable though.

Luxocd noticed his diary lying on the bedside table next to him. Frowning he noticed that some had attempted to force open the lock with… wait, are those burn marks. Thankfully it didn't look like they had succeeded.

Calmly he picked it up and removed a spare pen from his pocket.

He wrote.

**WHY THE HELL AM I LYING IN A GIRL'S BEDROOM!**

Luxoced looked himself over.

**And why am I not wearing a shirt.**

Why he did not write-shout this part is something we may never know. Or even want to know.

"Ah, you're awake! Great. I thought Aerith was going to yell at me for killing someone."

"Hmm…" Luxocd looked over to the voice coming from the doorway. It was the crazy raven haired ninja girl. "The Great Ninja Yuffie I presume." The amount of sarcasm he used was noticeable, even for someone like Yuffie.

Said great ninja pouted angrily, though her blush was clearly noticeable. "You should be nicer to me. I could have left you on that roof. But instead in a great act of selflessness I struggled heart and soul to carry you to a safe resting place." By the end Yuffie was actually positioned with a foot on a nearby stool with her right arm over her chest.

Heroic in a cheesy sort of manner.

Luxocd thought for a bit. "You kicked me off the roof and dragged me here didn't you."

Yuffie froze. 'Busted.'

"It would explain all the dirt in my hair." Luxocd pulled a small twig out of his blonde, now dirty blonde, yet for some reason it wasn't any messy than it normally was, spikes and flicked it across the room.

"T-the point is I didn't leave you on the roof. That's gotta count for something."

Luxocd sighed. "I suppose you're right. I apologise." While his sempai had explained it quite a few times before Luxocd still had difficulties grasping the fact that Organisation XIII were in fact bad guys and, therefore, DIDN'T HAVE TO APOLOGISE FOR THEIR ACTIONS. "Though I can't say you look like someone who would look to have such a girly looking room."

"It's not mine!" Yuffie screamed. "It's my friend Aerith's, she has the softest bed." Yuffie explained sighing. 'Thank Leviathan everyone's out today. Aerith would have an aneurism if she found out I had a boy in my bed. I don't what see what would happen if she found out that I had a boy in **her** bed.' Despite the danger of the situation Yuffie couldn't help but chuckle at the situation.

Suddenly though Yuffie became serious. "So spikey you going to tell me what you were doing skulking around the roofs of my town?"

"Sure, when you tell me why I'm shirtless." Luxocd returned flatly. Yuffie blushed a deep crimson before laughing manically. Well the serious Yuffie lasted about as long as anyone expected.

"I was just checking to make sure there was no damage."

"It's a bit fuzzy but I do remember being hit in the head. Why would that translate to torso damage?

"Uhhhhh…." Was about all Yuffie could get out while as red as a ripe tomato. Puberty **is** a confusing time.

"Never mind. I don't really care. Just pass me my clothes." Luxocd sighed shaking his head.

Yuffie answered in some un-intelligible gibberish and tossed him a grey sleeveless shirt and the black leather cloak and leather gloves that served as the Organisation XIII uniform.

Luxocd nodded in thanks.

"So anyway," Yuffie said not even bothering to hide the fact that she was leering as Cloud got dressed. "What's your name?"

Luxocd only 'hmmm'ed as he zipped up his cloak.

Yuffie sneered. "Rude assh-"

"Yuffie we're home!"

Yuffie epped and paled.

"I'm guessing that's your friend Aerith."

Yuffie nodded.

"I suppose I'll be going." Luxocd declared and walked over to the window and opened it…

CLICK!

… and opened it…

CLICK!

CLICK! CLICK! CLICK!

"Do you have a key for this by any chance?"

Yuffie facepalmed.

"Yuffie? Yuffie are you messing around in my room again!"

"Crap!" Yuffie screamed. "I'll go deal with this. You just… hide or something."

Without waiting for an answer the raven haired girl quickly dashed out the door.

Despite her not being there Luxocd nodded anyway and continued to fumble with the locked window.

He continued to do for a few minutes until…

"Wait a minute. I'm a numbered nobody of Organisation XIII why am I trying to escape through a window."

* * *

"Yuffie please get out of the way." Aerith asked politely. Yuffie stayed spread eagled barricading the front of the bedroom door.

"Ah who wants to go into a crummy old bedroom anyway." Yuffie chuckled hollowly with fake cheer.

Aerith looked over to Leon, who was busying himself polishing his Gunblade. The fur coat wearing swordsman looked up and sent the flower girl a look which said 'what do you want me to do'.

Aerith sighed.

"Yuffie if you don't get out of the way you are not getting any dinner."

Yuffie recoiled in horror. "Y-you can't do that."

Aerith resting her chin on her hand and smiled. "I'm the only person in this house capable of doing much more than boiling water. So if you or anyway else is willing to give dinner a try well… good luck." Yuffie began to waver. "By the way I was going to make chicken curry tonight. I suppose I should go put the chicken back in the fridge then."

The two girls glared at each other for what seemed like hours. Meanwhile Leon shook his head trying to forget that he knew these two psychopaths.

Eventually though Yuffie was forced to relent under superior skills and experience in the grand art of Mindfuck.

Aerith smiled and, after patting Yuffie's head, walked into the room.

Yuffie sunk to her hands and knees in defeat. A single shiny tear fell to the floor. 'Forgive me… spikey.' She does take this stuff seriously.

"Yuffie… what have I told you about sleeping in my bed?"

"Eh?" Yuffie leapt to her feet and dashed into the bedroom to find… Aerith straightening out the sheets on her bed?

"Well I suppose it could have been worse. Especially considering the Pirate incident. But next time just say sorry instead of barricading the door Yuffie." Aerith said before looking down at her younger friend. "Yuffie why are you looking under the bed?"

"Ahhhh… checking for heartless." The young ninja said not removing her head from under the bed, her voice muffled somewhat by the hanging doona cover.

Leon, who was standing by the door, opened his mouth to say something.

"For the last time Squall we are not putting her on medication." Aerith answered the unspoken question as she walked past the swordsman and out the door.

"… It's Leon." The Gunblade wielder said to no-one in particular before walking away.

Yuffie, who hadn't heard either comment, pulled her head out from under the bed and scratched her head. "At least that explains where Aerith hides her Yaoi manga. But it doesn't explain where spikey went. The windows still intact and he didn't strike me as a contortionist so the chest and cupboard are out of the question. So what the hell!"

Looking around the room Yuffie noticed a single page of white paper torn out of a book resting on the bedside table.

As the innately curious teenager she was she instantly picked it up and saw that written on it in clean and conscious handwriting was simply…

**The name is Luxocd.**

"… How do you pronounce that?"

* * *

"Kouhai!" Luxocd stopped walking and writing down a white corridor located in Castle That Never Was. Turning around at the word that Luxocd knew was meant for him. After all no one else was strange enough to agree to being called kouhai.

"Sempai." Luxocd said flatly to the shooter as he walked up in front of him.

Xigbar wasn't the only one who could appear out of nowhere though.

"Luxocd why do you keep letting him call you that? And why for that matter do you keep calling him sempai." Luxord asked appearing from behind a brilliant white pillar lined up ascetically with the wall.

"Clearly it's because he had great respect for me." Xigbar answered for his kouhai. Behind the Shooter Luxocd half shrugged in an 'it's just easier' motion and went back to writing in his diary.

The Gambler of Fate sweatdropped at both of them.

"So anyway kouhai," Xigbar turned around to face his junior, "I was wondering where you were?"

Luxocd looked up from his shiny leather diary. "What do you mean?"

"Didn't you hear? The Keyblade wielder showed up in Hollow Bastion."

Luxocd stopped writing mid-word. "The K-keyblade wielder did."

Xigbar and Luxord both nodded. "Yeah, we heard you were on mission there so we looked around to see if you wanted in on the whole 'first baddie encounter' thing Xemnas wanted done. Since you seemed annoyed at the whole lame first mission thing, but nobody could find you." Luxord elaborated flicking a few cards from his sleeve into his hand to play with. "Heh, heh. 'Nobody could find you' see what I did there?"

"Sadly yes." Xigbar sighed rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Found the Samurai though. Nice job by the way, I think that's the first time I've ever see anyone use logic on a mission like that."

Luxocd though wasn't listening to the praise from his sempai. He was on his hands and knees looking like he had just been abandoned by some higher being.

"Keyblade wielder… confrontation…

"Uh kouhai, you okay?"

… didn't… Samurai… Superior…

"I'll take that as a no then."

… why… fate?" Luxocd collapsed on the floor.

"…"

"…"

"Kill me."

"Okay drama queen."Xigbar shouted clapping his gloved hands together. "Clearly you need to get drunk." Xigbar declared pointing both of his index fingers at the limp body of his kouhai. Said kouhai gurgled. Xigbar sighed. "Come on I know a great place called Las Vegas. Chicks, gambling, booze, buffets and neon lights as far as the eye can see."

"Gambling, eh?" This peeked Luxord's interest. "I'm coming too." The gambler declared picking Luxocd up by his left arm. Xigbar took his right and formed a Corridor of Darkness.

"So where were you anyway?" Luxord asked pulling Luxocd into the portal.

"Lying unconscious on a girl's bed."

"…" Luxord almost dropped him.

"… Damn you to hell kouhai. Damn you to hell." Xigbar said shaking his head.

With that the group passed through the portal into everyone's favourite den of debauchery.

* * *

"Demyx!" The sitar player in question looked up to see the Superior of the In-Between towering over him.

"Ahhh." Demyx screamed and toppled him off the white couch he was sitting on.

Xemnas looked down at the Melodious Nocturne spladed out on the floor. "Out cold, wonderful."

"Is there a problem?" Saix asked the Organisation's leader walking into the Grey Area.

"Ah Vexen I was wondering if you could tell me where the Gaia Solider is, I have his next mission parameters prepared. I was going to ask Demyx but... the fools being un-professional."

"I thought he was unconscious." The blue haired man said calmly.

"Same thing." Saix almost sweatdropped but the glare he got from Xemnas quickly got him answering his leader's question.

"Luxocd? I believe Xigbar and Luxord dragged him off to some out of the way world to get drunk."

Xemnas sighed and, not for the first time, regretted allowing Organisation XIII members to run wild with the teleportation powers. "Fine then. If you see Luxocd tell his next mission is recon. Details are here." Xemnas said handing the Luna Diviner an envelope.

"Out of curiosity where will Number V be going?" Saix asked flicking the envelope around to look at the nobody symbol emblazoned over the seal.

"A world called Cocoon." The Superior answered before teleporting away with a Corridor, presumably to plot. Saix pocketed the orders.

"Xigbar told everyone to meet at the Rio Casino for the party. Should I wake Demyx up?" Saix looked to where the sitar player lay happily snoring. "No." The Luna Diviner decided before teleporting to another world to get drunk and gamble.

"Hey Aerith, whose the blonde guy in this picture?" Yuffie asked pointing to a dusty out of the way picture resting on a high shelf.

Aerith looked up from the pot of curry she was cooking. Her eyes dropped when she saw what picture the girl was pointing at.

"I suppose you wouldn't remember him too well. You were pretty young at the time." 'Though there was a time Yuffie would follow him around like a lost puppy.' Aerith thought picking up the picture and wiping dust off the glass frame. Allowing a better view of a young Cloud standing above a battered and dirty mini-Leon. "This is Cloud Strife he was part of our little group before the heartless attacked. He and Leon were good friends and sparring partners. They beat each other senseless each day for the fun of it. We were separated in the attack. I once heard some rumours about him involved in some gladiator matches then… nothing." Aerith sighed, her heart heavy with memories at the thought of her lost friend and went back to preparing dinner.

Yuffie continued to state at the picture for a while longer. Focusing intently on the smiling face of the blonde boy in it.

"Nah couldn't be." She decided finally and walked away.

End Notes-

**If you do act like a cat then does that mean you have nine lives?**

I still have eight of my twelve regenerations left.

**That's Doctor Who not a cat. I should have never let you watch the Christmas special.**

There were flying sharks!

**My point exactly you're brain is too easily over-simulated. It's starting to get crowded in here. [Looks around] Which reminds me where's Childness.**

Uh, due to attempts to make a shark fly she's currently being held in custody at the TV tropes website for attempting to jump a shark.

**Why am I not surprised.**

You're an asshole?

**True.**

So then what do you think?

**I hate everything you do.**

That's right. Well then I'll hope for reviews.

**Don't expect anything.**

You're being even more negative then you're usual self. Any particular reason why?

**Life.**

Don't go emo on me.

**…**

Don't go Strife on me either. Forget this, Jamata!

(1)- I think that's what it's called. If not then it begs the question, why the hell would I think it was called a Corridor anyway?


End file.
